Dear Ann Landers,
If I were a guest I’d be better behaved. This past week I had a guest arrive at my home unannounced. My Momma always told me to call ahead so that your hostess would be able to prepare for your arrival. My guest did not. I don’t even know when he arrived. Perhaps even in the early morning hours while we were sleeping. I knew that he was here because I saw signs of his arrival.
When I went to the pantry he had been there and chewed through the corner of the chocolate chip bag that I intended to make cookies for my children. Really if he had only asked for some chips I would have given them for sure. I’m big on hospitality.
Last evening I put some peanut butter out for him to dine on if he desired. He did ,but he left such a mess on my kitchen counters that I feel it necessary to sanitize it before it can be used again. Really, is that how a guest is to behave? My Momma told me to always clean up after yourself when you were visiting. It’s only polite not to make your hostess work more because you are there.
Last evening while we were sleeping he kept such late hours as to keep the house awake with his chewing. He must have known that I was displeased for each time I climbed from my bed to tell him to leave he quieted down but only long enough for me to crawl back into my bed. It wouldn’t have been too bad but I think he invited some friends over as well for the amount of peanut butter he ate was surely more than one could consume. My Momma would be appalled if I invited my friends over to another’s home without asking.
Just one more thing. I find it particularly rude that my guest investigates every corner of my home. There are places that I wouldn’t even show my Momma that he has been! Momma said that you should only go to the places in another’s home to which you have been invited and by no means should you investigate another’s bathroom drawers or medicine cabinet. That’s just plain rude. Maybe he didn’t have as good of Momma as I do but really some things just make perfect sense.
My Momma says that if you don’t have the answer no one does. I would be eternally grateful for your suggestions for the removal of my unwanted guest. It’s time for him to leave but I don’t want to be rude.