This past week I have been at a loss for words. Not because I didn’t have any to share but because I had no new pictures to go with them.
On a recent trip to Montana I lost the battery charger for my camera. I tried ordering another battery online but haven’t found anyone who stocks them. I thought it would be great to have a second charged up battery . I finally ordered a new charger for my camera but it was over a week ago and it’s not here yet so no new pictures with a dead battery in my camera.
Today has been a difficult day. I started loading up furniture and belongings of my two daughters and grandson into a pickup truck and trailer at 7am this morning. My daughters are starting the process of moving into their own apartment. We hit the road for the 45 minute drive to their apartment at 7:40am. By noon we had my truck, trailer and each of their cars unloaded into the second story apartment.
Our oldest has been in her own apartment for the past four years while she has attended college but home every summer to work. Our youngest who is 20 has never left home before and has a son that will be two next month. They will be moving into the apartment full-time in about three weeks.
Tonight when I got home from work the house is a mess with things half packed, half sorted just the way we left it this morning but with a silence that is deafening remaining. I started picking things up and putting them away trying to keep a positive attitude. Thinking thoughts like the house will stay cleaner longer, there will be less dishes to do and less laundry for sure. Since I’ve done such a bad job in cooking meals lately I won’t mention less cooking to do.
The girls and my grandson will come home on the weekends they assure me to do laundry. My sons now both in their own homes have busy lives between their homes, work and other interests. I struggle between feeling of wanting to put everything personal in the house away so I’m not reminded that they are not here or to start dragging out more pictures and stuff to fill the void.
On my livingroom walls I stencilled the words “There’s no place like home” many years ago, delighted that we were able to buy a home on a lake for our family to enjoy while our kids were growing up. Now it’s the last place I feel like being. If my husband said let’s go here or there…it wouldn’t matter where, I would go with him anywhere just to escape.
I’m excited for my kids to head out on their own. That’s the way it should be and I’m proud of them but does it have to hurt so much?