A Bad Day or Good: It’s a Matter of Perspective

12 Oct

At 5:20 pm yesterday I was busy cleaning up my work area when my brother-in-law paged me to say that I had a phone call on line 2.   I picked up and my youngest son was on the line.  I asked him how it was going and he said, “Not so great.”  I asked him what the problem was and he said that his motor blew up on his car and he was stranded in a parking lot about 90 miles from where I was and about 20 miles from his home.  I asked him what he would like to do and we came up with the plan.  

I would load my car on the flatbed at the shop and would unload it at his car.  Then we would load his car on the flatbed and I would follow him to his home where we needed to stop and pickup a used motor that he had for his truck which was sitting at my home with a bad motor.  If you are counting as I am writing the total count of my son’s cars with bad motors are two.  He’s not hard on cars,  just driving old vehicles with a lot of miles.

I began executing our plan by taking out the flatbed truck, a Ford F-650, filling my car with gas because it needed it, and then loading my car on the truck.  I was off for an evening of driving  alone for approximately five hours , loading and unloading of cars in the mix.   My husband had a school board meeting he couldn’t miss with an upcoming referendum so I was driving solo this evening.

When I was driving home last evening my husband called me and said,  “You must be exhausted, how soon will you be home?  I said, “In about a half hour”  After I got off the phone I started thinking about perspectives. 

All the way home I was feeling sorry for my son that he was having trouble with his car.  He doesn’t have money to buy a new and better car.  He just bought his first home last fall and is trying to make all the finances work out with home ownership.  He bought wisely within his budget but there are always things to spend money on when you are 24.  He has a lot of varied interests. 

His car is old.  It’s a Mercury Sable with over 250, 000 miles on it.  He just finished working on the front end of the car a couple of weeks ago and replaced a few parts.  He was trying to decide whether to fix his car with a used engine or get a different used car.  He was feeling defeated and down at the thought of the work.

After my husband’s phone call I started thinking differently.  It wasn’t anything he said on the phone that started that process, I just started to look at things differently.  I thought about my son again.  He is a very capable young man.  Because of our family business he has a learned a trade that will benefit him this week outside of his job as a Mechanical Designer, he is a mechanic. 

He has the ability to take his old motor out of his car and replace it with a used motor.  It will take him many hours to do it but he won’t have to pay anyone else to do it.  Also , because of our family business,  he has access to a flatbed truck to haul his vehicle and a fully equipped shop to work on his car. 

There are a lot of other young men and women that if they were in the same situation would be spending a lot of money to remedy the situation instead of the time he will need to spend to fix his car.  He may think yesterday was a bad day but when you look how it ended, I think it was good.  He is able to get up this morning and drive to work, business as usual. 

His evenings will be full this week but we got one thing accomplished last evening we were talking about for weeks and that was when would we have time to come with the truck to get the used motor for his truck.  Mission accomplished, not quite how he had imagined it.

 It may take a while for him to come around to my way of thinking, if ever.


Posted by on October 12, 2010 in Life Happens, Uncategorized


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4 responses to “A Bad Day or Good: It’s a Matter of Perspective

  1. Joe Clark

    October 12, 2010 at 8:02 am

    Wow, I have been where your son is now. It’s not fun, but you highlight some important points. He is lucky for the assets at his disposal, including family who can support him with material and shop assistance.

  2. flyinggma

    October 12, 2010 at 8:50 am

    The mother in me wants to fix everything and for my kids to have things easier.

    I’ve learned through life’s difficult experiences that you become stronger and learn thinking skills as you work through your problem. You begin to focus on what is important and not so much on the problem as you develop your plan and priorities.

    Sometimes that means that the easy fix isn’t the best solution and can lead to greater problems in the long run.

  3. Thomas Stazyk

    October 12, 2010 at 2:32 pm

    I agree it sounds like a good day for everyone all around. Too bad more families aren’t so ready to help each other out so completely!

    • flyinggma

      October 12, 2010 at 3:34 pm

      I think that there are a lot of families that would help each other more if there wasn’t a proximity issue. We are fortunate to have all of our children living nearby which allows us to help as needed.


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