I usually climb out of my warm bed and find the recliner in the livingroom and a warm blanket to wrap up in. The process begins… Read a book in hopes of getting tired enough to sleep. Watch a little TV or maybe just lay down on the couch where I can’t hear my husband breathing deeply as he peacefully sleeps while I lie awake. Once in awhile I make myself some hot chocolate. I don’t know if it helps me fall asleep but it sure warms me up.
Lately when I am awake I try writing for awhile. I write about the days events or maybe what is keeping me awake. The laptop makes it so easy to start writing because you don’t need paper and pen or even have to worry about writing neat. I’m a former school teacher so neatness matters to me. I expected it of my students as well as myself.
Tonight I am awake because I am thinking about things I can not change and how to make the best of circumstances. I am a problem solver by nature so it is frustrating to me when I come upon something that is causing pain for someone and I cannot fix it. I want to ease their load but that is not always possible but I try. I read a recent quote somewhere and it went something like “Don’t be yourself, be someone better” As difficult as that is, I will try to go beyond where I think I should be under the circumstances. Try to be a little nicer, more understanding than what I think the situation calls for from me and in the end maybe small change is possible where I thought none was possible.